


Android's Best Friend

by orphan_account



Category: Almost Human
Genre: Banter, Ficlet, Fluff, Gen, M/M, Pets, like literally half of this is just back and forth between dorian and john
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-22
Updated: 2014-04-22
Packaged: 2018-01-20 08:31:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1503776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Dorian, I am not buying a dog, damn it."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Android's Best Friend

"Dorian, I am not buying a dog, damn it."  
"A dog could be helpful, man. You might actually learn something about self-preservation," Dorian replied, scooping up a puppy that had jumped up on him.  
"What's that supposed to mean? I'm great with self-preservation!" John replied, promptly tripping over the the currently-empty pen. The dogs around it yelped and skidded away from him.  
"Oh damn," the detective groaned upon realizing his pant leg had gotten caught on one of the thin metal bars. When he yanked it off, the fabric ripped open to reveal a bloody scrape. Dorian quirked an eyebrow, attempting to stifle his laughter.  
"Oh yeah, that really helped me see things your way, John."  
John ended up buying a holographic goldfish. The damn thing barely needed maintenance, but it seemed to satisfy his partner’s need to make his life just that much more difficult.  
\---  
Dorian cradling a puppy was one of the oddest things John had ever seen.  
It was also among the most adorable.  
The android was inhumanly careful with the animal, holding it with one arm wrapped around its middle. The dog rested its head on Dorian's shoulder, and the DRN tilted his head towards it. He seemed reluctant to put it down. The dog didn't look too happy about it either.  
"Come on, D, we gotta go."  
"Just a second," Dorian murmured. He placed the dog gently on the ground, kneeling down to give it a final pat on the head. The dog whimpered quietly, and it looked at Dorian with the saddest eyes he or John had ever seen.  
\---  
"So, uh, didn't realize you were a dog person," John said on the car ride back to the precinct.  
Dorian was grinning widely, allowing the puppy to nuzzle into his neck, two large plastic bags of supplies sitting at his feet. John had caved and let him buy it.  
"Man, I love dogs," Dorian said to the other detective, then turned back to the dog. "Especially you, you adorable puppy, you."  
John sighed.  
"They're awfully hard to deal with. You sure you don't just love having a fuzzy...thing to cuddle with at night?"  
"You sure you don't just love having a partner to do your work for you?" Dorian snarked.  
"Hey, I do my work. It's you that's not gonna be able to do work, with this dog."  
"Reginald will behave. Won't you?" Dorian cooed.  
"Reginald?" John yelped.  
"Yeah, it suits him."  
"That's a ridiculous name for a person, never mind a dog. Why can't you just name him, I don't know, Fido or something?"  
"Fido is cliché, John. I still don't see the issue with Reginald. I’m basically naming him after you."  
"Just...don't curse your dog with that name, Dorian. Jesus."  
"But it's cute!"  
"Oh my god. I don't even know how to respond to that."  
"Fine. I'll call him Max."  
"Like Paul's MX?"   
"Do you have to question everything?"  
"Yep. It's my job, remember?" John smirked. "Wait...where are you going to keep Max?"  
"Well, I'd like to keep him at Rudy's, but something tells me that's not going to work out."  
"I'm sure Maldonado is going to love having him in the precinct."  
"Yeah, well. I wasn't about to leave him at that pet store."  
"Yes, you were."  
"Just because you were going to make me."  
"Listen, how about I take him home with me tonight until we figure this whole thing out?"  
"If you feed him noodles, I will kill you."  
"Whoa, that's disproportionate."  
"I'm serious, John, he needs proper nutrition. I have this dog food-"  
“Noodles are nutrition! They’re carbs. Fuel.”  
“Not for Regin-Max, they’re not.”  
“You are such a pain in the ass,” John muttered as he pulled into the precinct parking lot.

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this shortly before my dog had to go to a kennel and shortly after i watched the Common Law episode with the dog. so yeah. this is utterly unoriginal and i apologize.


End file.
